Damon VS Edward Who is Hotter Chapter 4

Damon VS Edward Who Is Hotter Chapter 4

I'm so happy!

Damon: *raises eyebrow* and why is that?

Well, for one we have a ton of reviews for this story and this other story I wrote plus great torture ideas!

Edward: What was the other story that you wrote?

Go look and see. It's called "My Deepest Secrets."

Edward: *reads story and dies laughing* oh my gosh, this story is awesome!

Damon: Let me read it! *reads story and eyes widen* YOU SICK WHORE! YOU WROTE A SLASH STORY ABOUT MY BROTHER AND ME????

Yep! *laughs* I couldn't find an incest story of you two on the site so I decided to write one!

Damon: You're SICK!

I know! Tee hee! 

Edward: So do I go home or can I stay and watch Damon be tortured?

Damon: GO HOME! NO ONE WANTS YOU HERE!

Hmmm....ok you can stay! *receives a death glare from Damon*

Damon: You -beep-

Ok, put your hands together for Stefan!

Crowd: *cheers and whistles* 

Stefan: *smiles* thank you everybody! It's a joy to be here today!

Damon: Joy for you, hell for me.

Stefan: Aw come on brother, lighten up. We're just going to play a game.

Damon: Yeah, and you also get TORTURED BEYOND BELIEF in it!

Stefan: It can't be that bad.

Damon: *quirks eyebrow* oh it can't can it? How would you like to sit through three hours of non-stop "Bella I love you so much" and "you'll always be my Bella" WHILE being tied to a chair with ropes soaked in VERVAIN!

Stefan: *scratches head* that could be pretty bad.

Damon: YOU THINK?

Edward: Vampire Diaries actually wasn't so bad. I laughed at the season finale when you kissed Katherine and not Elena!

Damon: SHUT UP TWINKLE TOES!

Stefan: Oh Damon, I've been meaning to ask you something, why are you wearing a dress?

Damon: *growls* Don't. Ask.

Stefan: *puts hands up* ok ok, no need to get all vicious on me.

Emily: If Damon gets too out of line, just call me or Broly. We'll set him straight.

Damon: STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM ME YOU CRAZY -BEEP-

Emily: I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that.

Ok let's start with our first contestant! Please welcome Heart-Broken-In-Love! She has been on this show before so welcome back!

Heart-Broken-In-Love: hehe I cant wait till you bring Stefan in! I would love to dip him in a tank
of vervain and let him  shrivel up like an old lady! Team Damon forever
because who wants someone who kills Bambi?

Stefan: *eyes widen*

Damon: *smirks* I like this girl. She knows who the right brother is.

Stefan: *screams as he is being thrown into a tank full of vervain*

Damon: May I add something? *goes over to the tank and drops a shark in*

0.0 Where in the world did you get a SHARK?

Damon: *shrugs* I just got it.

*Screams of agony could be heard*

Edward: It's fun to watch from the sidelines!

Damon: *growls* why can't you leave?

Edward: Why can't you grow a pair?

Damon: *grabs Edward by the throat* Would you like to join my brother?

Edward: I'm not even in this game anymore!

Damon: I don't care! You pissed me off!

Emily: *hits Damon with frying pan* bad Damon! Go sit down and let poor Edward alone!

Damon: *flips Emily off* 

Emily: *gasp* that's it! *grabs a bottle of vervain and pours it all over Damon*

Damon: *screams and runs away* Why do you even care about Edward? I thought you hated him!

Emily: Oh I do, I just feel bad for people that have to deal with your crap.

Damon: Oh you are SO lucky that your boyfriend is here or else I would've killed you a long time ago!

Emily: Even if Broly wasn't here I can still kick your butt.

Damon: Oh really? *runs up to Emily at vampire speed and grips her neck tightly* what now?

Emily: Haven't you learned anything? *pulls out a stake and rams it into Damon's stomach*

Damon: *rolls on the floor in agony*

Emily: *smirks as she walks over to Broly and kisses him*

Damon: YOU -BEEP-

Emily: Love you too sweetly! *waves*

Ok, does anybody think we should take Stefan out? He's been in there quite awhile.

Stefan: LET ME OUT OF HERE!

Broly: I'll get him. *pulls Stefan out and drops him on the floor*

Stefan: Ow my butt. I think the shark bit it off. 

Damon: *snickers*

Stefan: *gives Damon the death glare*

Ok now we are ready for our next contestant! Please welcome elenastarkiller!

elenastarkiller: Hehehehehehehehehehe and Edward goes down! :D Anyways, I'm Team Stefan because
he is just more mysterious and he would be nicer if I were to meet him. I
would totally want to be Elena. Sorry Damon.

Keep writing this! I anticipate this now (even though it's only 3 chapters
haha)

And how would you like to torture Damon?

elenastarkilker:  I want him to watch Stefan
and Katherine get hot and heavy while tied down with vervain ropes and a stake
in each leg. :)

Damon: YOU LEAVE KATHERINE ALONE!

*snaps fingers* Broly, tie him up.

Broly: *ties Damon up and puts a stake in each leg*

Damon: OW!!

*Katherine enters* why hello Stefan.

Stefan: *smiles* hello Katherine.

Katherine: Why is Damon all tied up and wearing a dress?

Stefan: Let's not worry about him. *kisses Katherine*

Katherine: Oh you naughty boy you. 

*Stefan and Katherine make out*

Damon: STOP IT PLEASE!!! 

Edward: *grins* this is great!

*10 minutes later*

Katherine: Well, this was fun but I must go. Places to go, people to kill. But will I see you again?

Stefan: Oh yes you will. *kisses her again*

Well, that was fun to watch.

Damon: THAT WAS AWFUL!!! 

Edward: I beg to differ.

Damon: SHUT UP AND JUST UNTIE ME!

Broly: *unties Damon and takes the stakes out*

Damon: *looks at Stefan with murder* YOU!! *tackles Stefan*

Stefan: It's just a game Damon gosh!

Damon: Were you saying that when that shark took a big clomp out of your rear?

Stefan: Umm...

Damon: Exactly! So don't tell me that this is a game because I know exactly what it is! It's torture!

Well, that was basically the point.

Damon: SHUT UP YOU WHORE!

Emily: Damon, you have servers anger issues. 

Damon: I do not have anger issues!

Edward: Yes you do.

Damon: *grabs Edward and throws him into a wall* I DO NOT!

Emily: Broly, I think you need to step in.

Broly: My pleasure. *beats the living daylights out of Damon*

Damon: *growls* I HATE YOU!!!

We love you too Damon! Now on with the show! Please welcome burntcinnamon!

burntcinnamon: I love this story dbz rox! Check out my story- Random Places Stefan and Damon
Other Characters?

Its kinda like this but there is a different idea behind it!

Of course I will! 

I think that Stefan and Damon are both hot! But Damon is hotter, my torture
for Stefan is-
Lets all get Stefan's car and throw it into a dumpster and then light it on
fire! Then lets burn his room on fire and set a hologram of Elena on top of the dumpster so the real elena doesnt get hurt and set her on fire! 
EMOTIONAL TORTURE BABE!

Great idea!

Stefan: You do anything to my car so help me god-

*smirks as I throw Stefan's car into the dumpster*

Damon: *lights it on fire*

Stefan: NOOOO!!! *falls to hands and knees crying*

Damon: *grins* that's not even the best part.

Stefan: wha- *sees Elena in the fire* ELENA!!!

Elena: Um Stefan, I'm right here.

Stefan: But I thought- *turns to see Damon laughing hysterically* YOU -BEEP- *attacks Damon*

Damon: Hey I'm not the one who thought of it! But it was a pretty good idea I must admit.

Stefan: I HOPE YOU BURN IN HELL!

Damon: And you guys say I have anger issues! Look at him! He's about ready to go on a killing spree!

Stefan: *grumbles under breath* whatever you say Snow White.

Damon: *growls* Go die in a ditch with Tinkerbell over there!

Edward: HEY!

Stefan: Atleast he looks like a man, you look like you came out of a beauty palor. 

Damon: Shut up! Atleast I'm not tinkerbell's twin.

Stefan: Don't compare me to him!

Emily: Ok I'm going to make this argument simple: Damon you look like someone's barbie doll and Stefan you look like Mr. Sprinkle Pants. 

Damon: *smiles sweetly* when will someone chop off that big mouth of yours?

Emily: When will you go Victoria's Secret? You need some wardrobe and pronto! 

Damon: When will you go jump off a cliff?

Ok I think everybody got the point here! Moving on! Next up is Alesandra54!

Alesandra54: Even Though I ABSOLUTELY love Damon...I'm afraid I would have to choose
Stefan. I need stability not a mahwhore =p I mean for a one night stand I'd
choose damon but over all its STEFAAAN!
I would torture Damon by...well having Kathrine admit she never loved him AND then killing her in front of him AND have broly kick his ** again lol =p

Wow you really are evil! I like it!

Damon: Wait what is going on? I wasn't listening.

*ties Damon up*

Damon: Oh great now what? *sees Katherine walk in* Katherine! What are you doing here? Oh god, you're not going to make out with Stefan again are you?

Katherine: Nope. I came here to confess. The truth is...I've never loved you.

Stefan: *stakes Katherine in the heart*

Damon: Wha-what? No, no!!! KATHERINE!!!! *gets free and runs to her side* Katherine wake up please!

Edward: *laughing* I knew she never loved you!! 

Damon: *screams in rage and attacks Edward with all his force*

Broly: Ok that's enough! *tries to get Damon off of Edward*

Damon: *picks up a piece of wood and rams it into Broly's body*

Emily: Broly tie him up so he can calm down.

Broly: *ties Damon up*

Damon: LET ME GO!!!

Emily: Nope. 

Damon: -BEEPING- WHORE!

Broly: *punches Damon*

Umm...ok while we wait for Damon to regain his cool let's move on shall we?

: You're all going to die.

Huh? Who said that?

: I'm going to eat your soul!

Who are you?

Broly: OH -BEEP- It's Frieza!

Damon: Why are you guys freaking out over a freezer?

Frieza: I am not a freezer I am Frieza!

Damon: Wow a talking freezer. That's so cool!

Broly: *slaps forehead* idiot.

Frieza: I am the strongest in the universe!! *fires a ki blast a Damon*

Damon: *dodges the blast using vampire speed while still stuck to the chair and rips the chair off* Cool a freezer that can fire lasers!

Frieza: STOP CALLING ME A FREEZER!

Damon: *runs up to Frieza* wow what are a cross dresser?

Frieza: I am not a cross dresser!

Damon: Could've fooled me with all that make-up and eye liner on!

Frieza: Atleast I don't look like Mary Poppens! 

Damon: Whatever. *rips into Frieza's skin and drains him dry*

Broly: 0.0 

Wow, well that was fun. Ok moving on to our next contestant! Oh Bonnie! You're back! 

Bonnie: Hi everyone. I wanted to try out this spell I learned on Damon.

What spell Is it?

Bonnie: *whispers* love spell. *casts the spell on Damon*

Damon: What? 

Bonnie: He will now lust over Stefan.

Damon: *looks at Stefan* Stefan, I love you!

Stefan: Uh oh! *runs away from Damon who is chasing after him madly*

Is anybody recording this to use as blackmail?

Emily: *giggles* I am!

Stefan: *runs away from Damon* stay away from me!

Damon: Come back Stefan! I want to -beep- you senselessly!

Hey Stefan! Let Damon kiss you! It'll be perfect for he blackmail and if you do I'll give you an entire forest with fat, plump bunnies!

Stefan: Fine but the bunnies better be fat.

Damon: *runs to Damon and kisses him hard*

Bonnie: Don't worry, he won't remember anything when the spell wears off.

Stefan: *pushes Damon away from him* where's the forest?

Over there. *points to a large group of trees with fat bunnies hopping around eating grass*

Stefan: They better be good. *goes over to the forest*

Damon: *rubs eyes* ugh what happened?

Oh nothing.

Damon: Are you sure? *looks at me suspiciously*

I'm sure Damon. 

Damon: *looks at Edward* why the hell are you laughing?

Edward: Oh it's nothing. I just thought of something funny.

Damon: And why is my brother chewing happily on bunnies?

I don't know. They must taste good. 

Emily: Look Damon, it's a talking freezer!

Damon: What?

Emily: *ties Damon up with ropes soaked with vervain and puts Barney on*

Emily: Hehe perfect torture idea!

Damon: Oh god no!! *glares daggers at Emily* you -beeping- little -beep- I'll kill you!

Emily: Don't make threats that you can't put into action.

Damon: I swear when I get out of this I'm going to hurt you so bad you won't be able to stand for a week!

Emily: *smiles as she watches the video on the camcorder*

Damon: What are you watching?

Emily: If you must know I'm watching Broly and I have some fun in our bedroom. *agonized screams could be heard*

Damon: Wow, you moan like a man and your boyfriend screams like he's being tortured.

Emily: *tries to keep from bursting out laughing at the recording of Damon moaning while kissing his brother* I know I do. Got a problem with that?

Damon: That's so gay. I would never moan like that. *turns to see Edward dying from laughter* will you please shut up?

Edward: I'm sorry. *continues laughing*

Damon: all you people are seriously annoying me today. And how long does it take to eat some bunnies?

Stefan: *comes back over with a drop of blood on his lips* sorry everyone. I was having too much fun. 

Damon: Yeah, because chewing on little furry white things is SO much fun!

Stefan: Be quiet Damon! You don't know what I went through to get them!

Damon: And I don't wanna know! Can we please end this pointless chapter already? Nothing interesting happened except for the part where Stefan got his -beep- taken off by a shark!

Hehe whatever you say Damon! I'm ending this chapter here but first let's tally up he votes shall we?

Emily: Stefan: 2 and Damon: 2. Congrats! It's a tie!

Damon: Yay, now we need somebody to be the tie breaker. Hailey. *smirks evilly as he grabs me and takes me backstage*

Nooo!!! I don't wanna go!!!!

Edward: What do you think he is doing to her in there?

Stefan: Don't ask. He's probably making her say "Damon is your master."

Emily: 0.0 poor girl.

*15 minutes later*

Damon: *brings me back* Now say what we rehearsed. 

Damon is my master and I vote for him.

Damon: Good girl. *pats head*

Emily: What did you do to her?

Damon: Showed her who's boss.

Ok so now Damon has three votes and Stefan has two. Damon wins this chapter!

Damon: Damn straight.

Hey, what happened to the -beep- thing?

Damon: I found out how that wrench was doing it so I took care of it.

Emily: What?? 

Damon: Oh and as for punishment for what you've been doing to me. *grabs Emily and takes her backstage*

*puts a hand on Broly's shoulder* Don't worry , Damon won't hurt her that much. Although I'm currently not able to sit at the moment.

Damon: *comes back with a red faced Emily* 

So, how'd it go?

Emily: That SOB deserves to rot in hell!!!

Damon: Aww it wasn't that bad. Hailey enjoyed it.

Fuck. You.

Damon: Really? Again so soon? I don't know. This little red balloon over here packs a punch.

Emily: I'M GONNA MURDER YOU!!! Starting with chopping off your balls! -gets a chainsaw-

Broly: Emily honey-

Emily: Shut up Broly or else you're next!!

Broly: *sighs*

Damon: GET THIS CRAZY BITCH AWAY FROM ME!!! *runs away from Emily who is waving a chainsaw around madly*

Emily: I'm going to make sure that you are in EXTREME pain!!!

Damon: *smirks* you have to catch me first!

Oh lord. Well, hoped you enjoyed reading and please leave your torture ideas at the door on your way out! Peace!

Emily: DAMON!!!!!